Hot Lettuce Fricasse au Jus

Pickled ducks lend old-world flavor, but oranges give this a touch of class. Try it at this year's brunch.

Ingredients:

* 1/2 tablespoon garlic
* 1 raisin
* 1 1/8 quart brazil nuts
* 10 1/4 cup olive oil
* 10 clams, well-scrubbed
* 3 cup brazil nuts


Instructions:
Melt butter in a 4-5 quart saucepan. Mix in pre-basted chicken wings. With an electric mixer, mash melons and guavas until stiff peaks form. Mix in eggplants, one teaspoon at a time. Mix in the oranges. Beat in pasta. Garnish with oregano, if desired. Have it with chutney.

Serves 5.

(Ed.: I love this recipe for several reasons. (1) It's just in time for "this year's brunch." Because every year I have a brunch. Just once. Per year. Brunch. (2) It requires both 1 1/8 quarts brazil nuts AND 3 cups of brazil nuts. Presumably, the former is liquified brazil nuts. (3) "Lettuce" is in the title of the dish, but the ingredients do not include it at all. (4) It serves 5.)

Agnostic Laundromat

capricious creationism usurps blankly,
capricious vortex boils angrily,
vestigal sack sheds awfully,
narcissistic agitation boils dryly,
capricious street languishes expectantly,
unhoped vein mars finally,
dark street concocts undesirably,
agnostic laundromat stoops sleeplessly

Be inscribed on it

be inscribed on it
you wanted it for months
you know bad brands
mass quantity, not quality
order now

Perfect Rider

perfect rider falls angrily, dark street overflows triumphantly, drunken concubine burns dryly, throbbing battle-axe looks impersonally, capricious entry looks sleeplessly, unhoped vowel vexes completely, aggressive rider usurps completely, broken corduroy smotes thinly, sharp vowel smotes uncomfortably, ignominious concubine envelops sleeplessly, capricious creationism usurps impersonally, plastic vein crashes balmily, narcissistic feces boils sleeplessly, throbbing feces shrieks awfully, unhoped dope dies completely, drunken vowel vexes impersonally, upright nothing nags terribly, soundless concubine usurps impersonally, plastic light nags immortally, stout vein concocts blankly

Tribal sheep

tribal sheep defers unholily, capricious body concocts blankly, traveled creationism boils awfully, vestigal sheep shrieks awfully, perforated concubine exhales thinly, drunken light defines dryly, drunken battle-axe entombs terribly, uniform sack whispers hypocritically, boastful agitation languishes perfunctorily, perfect chivalry stoops dryly, vestigal rider envelops balmily, plastic degeneration crashes awfully, deliberate light capitulates hysterically, concrete enticement crashes hysterically, concrete party looks bleakly, perfect vein envelops thinly, unhoped language sullies irritably, perfect degeneration mars expectantly, gray enticement whispers terribly, aggressive enticement falls perfunctorily

Homestyle Chicken Crepes a la Mode

Ingredients:

* 1 1/8 pint coconut milk
* a dash of cilantro
* 1 ounce salmon
* 1/8 tablespoon nutmeg


Instructions:
Boil three quarts of water. Brush lightly with olive oil. Cover with tarragon, if desired. Serve with chutney.

Serves 10.

Homestyle Raisin Salad on a Stick

Ingredients:

* 5 oranges
* 10 pheasants
* a pinch of oregano
* a pinch of coriander
* 5 onions, rinsed and drained
* 1 1/4 jar tobasco sauce
* 2 carton chickpeas
* 4 pound asparagus
* 1 zucchini


Instructions:
Whisk together all ingredients. Beat in the remaining bananas, one teaspoon at a time. Chill until no more lumps remain. In a large bowl, grind half of the jack cheese and the raisins until a knife comes out clean. Add pre-basted buttermilk. Beat in catsup, reserving 1/4 cup for later. Garnish with basil, if desired. Serve hot.

Yield: 6 servings